Watching the news on Katrina, and monitoring the stock market a bit. Thought I would let you know how things resolved on the teen front. My husband made a huge difference in handling the talks. Private talks are sometimes really important, they are much better than fiats. heh.
Anyway, denied daughter was sitting, subdued in mood, on the couch. She had obviously been crying for awhile. So, went and talked with her a bit…sounding out how she felt, acknowledged the feelings of disappointment. This daughter tends to get resigned, so I don’t like to leave things in what, for me as a parent, could be a relieved silence.
We talked a bit about what things she would be interested in, and some of the parent side views of time and opportunities. Sometimes at this age I feel I don’t really know who my child is. They seem so …metamorphasizing. Hidden in that stage that is becoming something, but I can’t quite see whether it is going as it should or not.
I remember very well what I was at that stage, but my child is not me. I can’t say I know for sure what she feels, but I know that some of the things I moved towards were definitely not for my final good. Because at the early teen stage the view is distorted. I think it clears quite a bit by the time they’re sixteen, but then the parent can fool themselves into thinking that because the kid sees well they can act well.
It doesn’t necessarily follow. Sixteen yr. olds need lots of supervision, and accountability.
With all my kids different types of personalities….. I dare not generalize more than that. Those are just the general truths found so far.
We all need understanding and support- at whatever age, that much I discovered. Oh the humanity;)
Unlike New Orleans…we are in safe harbor, for now.