My Life: The Mosh Pit

I had to look up the definition of mosh pit, btw. If you look it up it will tell that this is where people mosh 😉

Anyway, as I slam dance ( first hint) my way through all the obligations of a middle-aged woman, but not the run of the mill middle-aged woman….. no, this one has been out of the business loop for ever so long…… I am finding that I am backpeddling once again. YES! Dawdling, but now mixed with working here and there on things that I am not at all sure I like, but find interesting in a twisted sort of way.

Would you like the short version of my translation of that? De-Clutter attempts mixed with working on finances. I actually had to learn about the stock market. And at what better time? Exactly. When it is stagnated and flat… when neither bear nor bull know which way to turn.

Maybe they do. But it could sure fool me. It probably does fool me, because I understand probably only half of a very complex insider sort of language. Stocklish.

I am glad I carry responsibility well. Otherwise I would be writhing at the prospect of selling stuff that belongs to my siblings. I was given direction to, but …EH! It is hard. ( I do writhe a bit sometimes at night, if the truth were told, but I get over it in time to function the next day).

I’ve done two days of exercise…yay me. I occasionally garden, which is so unsatisfactory. I need much more time to garden. It is my art.

I don’t need to say more. I have another blog to put this stuff on, but truthfully I would find it difficult to put together a truly cogent post that is truegrit material – and I need to keep the blog rolling ( heehee oh help me, I couldn’t resist that).

I was starting to learn the photoshop 7, and I am bogged down in the digital camera stuff. I need something more carefree…. the camera needs all this special knowledge…. but I did find the book of directions, so that might help. I haven’t had any time for graphics work, anyway.

I did throw away lots of clothes, however. Not exactly throw away… gave them to the Charity bin. Nice stuff. That I saved for YEARS. Only twenty more bags to go……

I just said that for effect. I didn’t really count them. It could be more.

It probably should be.

Well, enough of Ilona-lite, although another things I was thinking about is that I am split on my view of myself: maybe I am not as serious I have been led to believe. Or maybe the lightness of being is not so very alien as I thought. Why this? I picked up another of those “Your Style” type books. It was a new release, and I didn’t feel like another garden book. I sure didn’t feel like a political or social commentary. So while skimming through the pagan, new-age couched style ideals and encouragements of “Being Our True Self”, I found myself left with the old question: What defines us? What is our essence or core? Who really articulates that?

Another time, amis. Because who -really- is the ‘me’?