It has been really hard for me to keep up with everything and try to learn this WordPress program. I also had to relearn things on the graphics manufacture because I had been away from it so long.
My mother’s apartment area is nearing completion, although there is still a lot to do. I’ve been praying for direction and wisdom quite a bit, but then seem to give my energies to the opposite. Why is that?
My fatigue extends to my interests in what is going on. Opining upon it, anyway. You noticed that already, though didn’t you?
Well, what a difference a day makes:) I’m leaving the first part of this because that is what I was writing yesterday, and it is something I go through…sometimes life just weighs upon your soul. But today, with help of some specific thoughts and the grace of God I feel so much more hopeful, and the possibility of finding my direction. Direction is very important to me.
This morning, a couple things in church ministered to me. One was a song. It was one of those worship songs that take scripture straight out of the bible. To me, those are some of the best of songs to sing. There is just something so wonderfully powerful about the Word of God. The defining phrase for me was “there is nothing that can separate me from the love of God’. I think I get so discouraged because I allow bitterness to take root. I somehow lose sight that nothing is more powerful , more influential, than the love God has for me. I am in the stream of that love, so long as He is foremost in my life. So nothing that others might do against me, nothing that could obstruct me becoming what I ought to become is greater than the power of the love of an all- powerful God. I would be so much less angry, frustrated, and bitter if I remembered that.
So this morning I made a decided turn in my heart to speak those words to myself whenever I start to rehearse past disappointments or losses. “Can this separate me from the Love of God in Christ? Can this frustrate God’s purpose for my life? Is this a reason that I should believe that I have little hope for change or accomplishment?” “No.” :No, because it cannot separate me from the Love of God, nothing can. No spirit, no circumstance, no person here or from the past, no curse, no shortcoming, nothing in the here and now, nothing in the hereafter. Nothing. I am connected with an unbreakable connection to the all powerful, all merciful, Everlasting God.
I see the light through the wall of darkness that seemed to rise up and stop me so often. There is a way through, and it is this love that God affords me in Christ that is that way through. I am hopeful, and it lifts my spirit to remember this.
Then there was the most wonderful prophetic word. When the prophetic is working, it can be a formidible force to break through the discouragement that so often shrouds – me anyway. I guess sometimes you need that fresh application of hope and strength that comes through someone reminding you of a truth, and spiritually there is that ‘je ne sais quoi’ of the reverberating Spirit of God in a person. The message concerned breaking through the dullness of the broken dream, and looking with renewed hope to what God was going to do. Because God is still God. No matter what has failed, no matter what is lost, God is still God.
The preached message had to do with the Ephesian Church and the importance of the first love, the delight, in Christ.
It moved me forward, and I am quite different than when I awoke this morning.
I feel I found my direction again.